Post Funny Stories Submit
Post Funny Stories Submit
We saved the best stories for the book...Buy it here. BUY IT HERE
 
View More Posts

Tyler - Award Winner

 

Life

Son: If Grandma is WATCHING ME today, is CHUCKIE THE SCARY DOLL going to be there?

Mom: NO

Son: Your LYING

Mom: Mommy DOESN'T FIB

Son: YES YOU DO...AND YOU CHEAT AT CANDYLAND TOO


HontheP.com

Parker, 3 - Award Winner

 

Life

While cleaning up a mess worthy of a second shower for me and a bath for the rest of the crew, Parker looked over my shoulder out the window... "Look Mommy the sun is coming up." Awww, nothing like a child to make you stop and smile even while trying not to gag. "It is Parker, isn't it pretty?" "Yes. Daddy put the sun up for us. Daddy took down the moon and put up the sun." Yes Parker, Mommy is on her knees putting your poo where it belongs but Daddy took down the moon and hung the sun for you.
HontheP.com

Richie, 6 - Award Winner

 

Life

Dad: Son can you go GET ME A RULER? 

Son: Here's MOM, SHE KNOWS HOW TO RULE


HontheP.com

Matt, 5 -

 

Life


HontheP.com

Andrew, 4 - Award Winner

 

Life

I was shopping with my son in the lingerie department looking for new under garments.  As I was looking through the underwear racks my son yelled from across the way "Mom, no granny pannies." I only wished I had a camera with me to capture the look of horror ont the faces of the older ladies in the department store

HontheP.com

Samuel, 3 -

 

Life


HontheP.com

Gretchen - Award Winner

 

Life

I took my daughter shopping with me, looking for a new La-Z-Boy recliner. The store was busy but I spotted the perfect chair up near the front entrance. "Come on, sweetheart, I found a La-Z-Boy" I told my daughter, pointing ahead. There was another lady and two little boys looking at the same chair. Gretchen stopped when we got near. Confused, she asked "Mommy, which boy is the lazy one?"
HontheP.com

Lori, 5 - Award Winner

 

Life

I announced to my daughter, Lori, that her Aunt just had a baby and that it looked just like her Uncle. She said, "You mean he has a mustache?"
HontheP.com

Shaina, 7 - Award Winner

 

Life

My daughters were bulding a snowwoman when the two boys next door came out and began making a snowman. An argument started about whose was better? "That's not a snow woman", said the first boy. "Yeah it doesn't have boobies" snickered the second boy. "With her hands on her hips, Shaina snapped "So what. Yours isn't a snowman either... It doesnt have a boy scarf", pointing at a pink one wrapped around it's neck.
HontheP.com

Anonymous, 8 - Award Winner

 

Life

I took my Grandson to our cabin one weekend.  In the evening, he become upset because he began noticing lots of mosquitoes.  I tried to make him feel better by telling him "If we turn the lights off and stay in the cabin we won't attract the mosquitoes. It seemed to work for a few minutes until my Grandson screamed "It's no use...now the they're coming after us with flash lights." (Fireflies)


HontheP.com

Bailea, 3 -

 

Life

One day during naptime my two oldest boys (5 & 6) decided to watch a movie.  The only problem was the movie was too loud, and my younger ones (1 & 2) were sleeping.  My 2 year old daughter woke up, came out of her room and in an angry voice said "Guys, I was so sleeping."  I told her that she could go back to bed if she wanted, so she turned around and went back to her room. Within a few seconds, though, she walked back out and acted like nothing had happened.
HontheP.com

Tristan, 3 - Award Winner

 

Life

My wife and I took the kids camping at a nice recreational area for Memorial weekend last year. We were having a great time, the kids were playing on the beach, I was grilling hotdogs for lunch and my wife was catching some rays. Our 3 year old son, Tristan, came over to tell us he had to go to the bathroom for the 5th time that day.  The restrooms were quite a ways away, so my wife said "Just go pee in the water."  He walks into the water, turns back and at the top of his lungs shouts, "Is this a good spot to pee Mom?" My wife turned beet red and said, "Tristan, what are you talking about? Get back over here." He yelled again, "But you told me to pee in the water, so is this spot OK?" I laughed so hard that beer squirted out of my nose.
HontheP.com

1st Grade Teacher - Award Winner

 

Life

I asked my class "Do you know what a Hobo is?" One little boy immediately responded "I know I know...it's someone who doesn't have cable."


HontheP.com

Izzy, 6 - Award Winner

 

Life

This morning while getting ready for school, I overheard my daughter in the bathroom saying "Well that was easy." When I asked what she was talking about, she said "Making myself beautiful for school."
HontheP.com