I told my daugher, Izzy, "It's time to clean up your playroom."  Never lacking an excuse, she replied "But Mom, I'm a superhero... and superheros don't clean, they save the world."

While presenting her "All About Me" school project, Izzy's teacher asked her what she was doing in the picture she had drawn of herself. She replied "I'm on my way to Margaritaville," spoken like a true Jimmy Buffet fan.

Friend: What does your mom do as a job? 

Daughter: You feed the babies.

Worried about my daughter getting reprimanded for talking too much, I asked her if she'd gotten in trouble yet for talking in school.  She replied earnestly "God gave me a mouth for talking, and I'm going to use it!"

The teacher had the kids write down an answer to the question "How are you and your Mom different?"  My 1st grader wrote "We put on different costumes."

Izzy: Mommy, I don't want to help with the twins anymore. They're boring... I think we should sell one of them, which one is cuter?

Daughter:  I know why GOD SENT ME TO YOU

Mom: Why

Daughter: Because YOU NEEDED SOMEONE HELP YOU CLEAN THIS MESSY HOUSE everyday

My Son's new favorite game is tackle football. Unfortunately, he always makes his little sister the quarterback for the other team, yet oblivious to this fact.  Guess it beats th earlier game of the day - bamboo stick ninjas.

When my daughter NOTICED 2 DOGS PLAY FIGHTING across the street, she said "Wow mom that BIG ONE ON TOP must be a JACK WRESTLE TERRIER (Jack Russell Terrier)

"I love to drink milk evne if it is cow pee pee" my daughter said at dinner.  "It's not pee, it's milk... just like when I breast fed you as a baby" I corrected her.  "Gross.  Can we just go with the cow pee pee instead?" my daughter pleaded.