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Skylar, 3 - South Carolina

Gross

My three-year-old daughter peed on the floor in our hallway. When I asked her why she hadn't gone on the potty she looked at me as if it was obvious and replied " I had to make a pit stop."
HontheP.com

Andrew, 10 - Nevada

Gross

In second grade, Andrew's teacher asked, "Class what rules do you guys have at home?" Andrew shot up his hand and replied "We are not allowed to fart in the car."
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Anonymous, 7 - New Jersey

Gross

I was having a conversation about why no one ever changes the toilet paper roll in the bathroom when my seven-year-old son pipes up and says "I dont really poop that much, so you dont have to worry but me. But my sister, well you should watch out for her.....she poops ALL the time."
HontheP.com

Aaron, 5 - Michigan

Gross

Matthew, 10 - Pennsylvania

Gross

Trying to impress me the other day, my son said "I can kill three birds with one stone." Being a typical boy with an interest in video games and taking things apart, I wasn't sure I wanted to know, but still I asked "What do you mean." With the proudest look on his face he replied "Well the other day in the shower I washed my hair, pee'd and brushed my teeth all at the same time." What more could a Mom ask for?
HontheP.com

Andrew, 4 - Louisiana

Gross

I took my son, Andrew, who was sick with the stomach flu and throwing up to the pediatrician. While she was examining him and asking him what was wrong, he replied earnestly "I spilled myself."
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Henry, 1 - South Carolina

Gross

My son, Henry, is only one and his two favorite past times are playing in the bathroom and playing with remotes. So as I saw him toddle to the bathroom out of the corner of my eye with the remote, I yelled to my husband, "Babe, quick shut the toilet lid, he's headed that way to drown the remote." Then I had to look around to figure out who would say such a crazy thing. Turns out, it was me. This is the life of a mom.

http://styleandease.blogspot.com

William, 5 - Utah

Gross

Cleaning the kid's bathroom like Jesus is coming, I discover a mutated nastiness beyond description. Upset, I point to the disgusting ojbect and ask my son, William, "What's this?" He replies, "You know how you're always saying 'there's some things I'd rather not know?' well, Mom, I think this is one of them."
http://mommysmemorandum.com

Parker, 3 - Colorado

Gross

Recently, my son provided me with some sage philosophical advice, showing him to be wise beyond his years. Out of the blue he said "Mommy, sometimes things don't work out. So sometimes you end up with cat puke, and sometimes it's just cat poop. Either way Mom you have to clean it up."
www.pampersandpinot.com

Parker, 3 - Colorado

Gross

Parker had been taking too long in the bathroom so I shouted through the door "Parker, what are you doing?" He replied "I'm touching my poo poo." Dreading the mess that could await me on the other side of that bathroom door. I slowly opened the door to find Parker standing there with his finger in his butt. Needless to say, I washed those hands good to a chorus of "We don't touch poo poo in our butt." These are words of wisdom that last a life time.
www.pampersandpinot.com

Sam, 5 - New Jersey

Gross

We were taking a long road trip to Canada when we had to stop for gas. Sam was getting antsy and said, "Mommy, why do we have to stop? Let's go already." I told him that we couldn't drive the car without gas." Sam thought for a moment, then let out the loudest fart I'd ever heard. I looked at him in shock. He smiled with content and said "Now we have gas...can we go already."
HontheP.com

Timmy, 5 - New Jersey

Gross

I was spraying some rose-scented Glade air freshener around the house, and Timmy asked "What is that, Mommy?" I answered "It's perfume for the house. It can come in any smell you like." Timmy made a face and said "I just hope you don't spray the one that smells like Grandpa."
HontheP.com

Eythen, 6 - Kansas

Gross

After school my son, Eythen, couldn't wait to tell me the exciting news "Mom, Mrs. Jamison has a pet turtle named Chip but Harleigh said he got ran over by a truck a few years ago. I can't wait to see him. I bet he's flat since he got ran over by a truck. Or maybe he has band-aid's all over. Shaking my head I reply "I am pretty sure it's a different turtle from the one she had when Harleigh was in 1st grade."
http://moorepartyof5.blogspot.com/

Anonymous, 3 - California

Gross

My husband and I decided to sleep in one morning, and boy did it turn out to be a big mistake. When we woke up there was baby powder on the TV, entertainment center, dresser, carpet, and even my one year old baby.
http://dvrdame.blogspot.com/

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